Taking a Break

After our disappointing news last weekend, Jacob and I had some decisions to make.  

We have two embryos in cryopreservation, which means that we have one more chance to get pregnant on this session of IVF.  However, we have decided to wait until January or February of next year before we try another implantation.

I am tired of putting my body through hormone injections and I am tired of having my heart broken. Plus, it seems like a lousy way to spend Christmas- constantly afraid that anything I do wrong will cause me to lose the embryos. Again.

So, for the next few weeks my posts will be about something other than infertility. But we’ll probably let you know when we begin again because we need all the prayers that we can get!

Things for Which I Am Thankful

• Jacob
• My wonderful family
• My wonderful friends
• My faith in my Heavenly Father (even though sometimes I get kind of mad at Him. Is that allowed?)
• My job as an educator:
  • the great kids I have this year
  • the great administrators (seriously THE BEST)
  • the great co-workers at OMS
  • teaching a subject that I enjoy
  • the good benefits
  • my salary which gives us some money for playing and paying for things like IVF.
• Sammy, my puppy and Frank, my kitty
• My neighborhood – clean, safe, good neighbors, close to work, close to grocery store, close to the cemetery,
• The advances in medical technology that keep giving me hope.
• The advances in communication technology like Skype, Facebook, and blogging.
• My home:
  • warm bed to sleep in
  • fridge full of food
  • washer and dryer
  • hot shower
• Books, stories, movies, and other fun relaxing escapes from reality
• Coca-Cola and Chocolate
• Pizza that is delivered with cheesy breadsticks
• Pens – I love pens!
• The holiday season
• Thanksgiving feasts!

Negative Results

I knew this morning when I woke up and saw that I had begun bleeding that the news that I got today was probably not going to be positive.  I tried to convince myself that everything was fine, lots of women continue to have periods when they are pregnant, but I knew. Deep down, I knew.

I held myself together until after my blood draw. Then I had a meltdown in the hospital parking lot.  My sister-in-law calmed me down. On the way home, I had a strong feeling of peace that everything was going to be okay. That didn’t really stop the crying though.

I got the official call from the Idaho Center for Reproductive Medicine as I was pulling into the Smith’s grocery store. Even though I knew what she was going to say, it didn’t make it any easier to hear.  I sat there in my car for over 20 minutes. Every time I thought that I was composed enough to go into the store something would trigger another onslaught of tears. After some encouraging texts from my little sister I was able to get my groceries and get home.

I feel like I am completely torn in half. On the one hand, I was so positive that I was pregnant and the truth is devastating. I feel disappointed, I feel angry, I feel so very sad. On the other hand, that warm, fuzzy feeling that I had earlier helped to prepare me, I suppose. As I was leaving the grocery store parking lot, an ambulance zoomed past with lights flashing and horns blaring. I found myself thinking that I am grateful that wasn’t me or one of my family members, and hoping it wasn’t someone I knew in there. It’s hard to be too sad when you’re busy being grateful you’re alive and well and not celebrating Thanksgiving in a hospital.

I have worn myself out with worrying all morning and crying all afternoon. It’s time to take a nice long relaxing nap, drink a Coke (thanks, friend), and try not to think too much.  

A Non-Update

I am sorry that I haven’t posted lately.  I have discovered something frustrating about IVF.  Like all other types of conception there is a waiting period before I know if I am pregnant or not.  Grrr. I hate being patient. 

In my case the waiting period is almost two weeks!! So, since embryo implantation was last Sunday I won’t know anything definite until next WEDNESDAY! And if you think that is long for you to wait, well, let me tell you… it is killing me!!!  Every few hours I think, “gee I have to go to the bathroom again?” or “ooh, I am kind of sore today,” or “something smells really strong right now, I wonder if my nose is extra sensitive right now?” . I am very much a hypochondriac.

Anyway, for those of you who are being optimistic here are some statistics. There is a 58% chance of at least one of the two embryos sticking around to become a cute little person.  There is a 15% chance of both little embryos sticking around.

For those of you who are more pessimistic here are some statistics for you: there is a 42% that neither embryo will stick around, and there is a 15% chance that both little embryos will be sticking around.

(As you can see, I haven’t made up my mind on the twins thing. Two for the price of one?! Yes!!! Eek, what am I thinking?!!?? Twins would be soooo cute!!! How could I handle it?! But. . . )

Okay, well, I’d better go twiddle my fingers in the other room. If I stay on my laptop any longer I’ll start creating one of those silly pregnancy tickers, and probably start shopping for nursery decorations, and looking at baby name websites. Oh wait, I’ve already done those things. 

Thankful for my problems

Well, first of all I feel that I need to apologize. I need to apologize to all the couples out there who have been struggling with fertility issues for a long time and have not been able to find a cure. How dare I complain and moan after one stressful weekend?! I am actually incredibly blessed. I have a diagnosis for one thing. It is actually quite comforting when a doctor can you tell you exactly what is wrong with you and how she is going to fix it. I recently met up with a friend who has been doing IVF for six months with no success. She is frustrated and upset and I don't blame her a bit. Listening to her struggles made me grateful for my own. The lesson I've learned: be thankful for my challenges in life because I can guarantee that someone in this big, wide world is worse off than me.

Speaking of fixing my problems: I went up to Boise on Tuesday and they began the IVF process. They put me under general anesthesia (oh how I both love and loathe anesthesia) and very carefully pulled out all of my multitude of eggs with a very sharp syringe thing.

Okay, so I don't actually know how it happened because I was in dreamland and never actually saw a thing. One moment the doctor is asking the nurse about her favorite vacation cruises and the next moment they were telling me that they were all finished. Kinda trippy.

Anyway, I talked to the IVF coordinator this morning and she said that everything looked like it was going well. I will go back up this weekend and then we cross our fingers and hope.

A Cinderella IF

Do you remember that part in Cinderella when the heroine of the story wants to go to the ball?  The evil stepmother says of course she can go to the ball, IF she gets all of her work done.

In other words, keep on wishing Cinderella ‘cause life has to get a whole lot more difficult before it is going to get any better.

I feel like I was given a Cinderella IF this weekend. We had an ultrasound on Friday afternoon that showed images that shocked even my expert doctors. Apparently the medication worked too well and, while I don’t really want to get into all of the personal details, they are changing their course of action so that I don’t end up with a dozen children and my own reality TV show.

That leaves us with two options.

• Option 1: We go on birth control and not try to get pregnant this month. All of the medication, money, and self-injections considered a failure.
• Option 2: We make an abrupt detour in another direction and begin in-vitro fertilization (IVF) treatments.

We decided to try the IVF. If it didn’t work than we were in the same place we would be at the end of option 1 and at least we could say we had tried everything. Right?

Well, tonight I am wondering if I am crazy. Today I heard the word “if” at least a million times. And it turns out that IF all of those ifs pan out then maybe we will end up with a baby. If my hormone levels are at the right place tomorrow, and if they can find the medication that they need (which they don’t have), and if I can get the days off from work, and if all the sciencey stuff works…. if, if, if, if, if.  Who knew such a small word would make such a big impact on my day?

This is my first round of IVF. I have heard of women who go through this for months and months.  I wanted to give up after 24 hours.  How do they handle the stress? My hat is off to you ladies. If this doesn’t work this month, I may start filling out adoption papers.

A Big Sigh of Relief

Phew!!!

Everything is going to be fine. It always is, really. I work myself up into a tizzy worrying about things that are completely out of my control. I need to learn to sit back, take a deep breathe and a long sip on a Coca-Cola and say, "What can I do to make this situation better?" If the answer is nothing, then so be it.

I have been able to schedule in all of the appointments that I needed and the pharmacy came through as promised. The medications may or may not work, but again, that is out of my control. I am going to sit back, relax, and enjoy my Halloween evening.

As a side note, if you or someone that you know is looking for some inspirational reading about infertility I recommend this blog: http://blog.freedomfertility.com

Have a wonderful day!

The Stresses of Infertility

First off, I kind of want to apologize for my last post on infertility. Obviously I was a little emotional when I wrote it – otherwise I would have never accused people of “not understanding”. Lots of people have expressed sympathy and kindness. Thank you.

Also, I can’t believe how many people have contacted me about their infertility issues or the infertility of family members since I last posted about infertility. And, really, if you have a sister or a cousin or a close friend with infertility, you really are almost as heart broken as they are. And it is much, much more common than one might realize.

Anyway, today I’m going to talk about how stressful infertility can be. This weekend was one of the most stressful EVER!

Why can’t life just be easy?  Why must there always be another challenge?  It doesn’t seem fair. I mean, I get past one problem just to run into another one. Why?!?!

Can you tell that I am frustrated? But I should probably start with some back ground information.  I am seeing the doctors at the Idaho Center for Reproductive Medicine in Boise, but because of the distance and time involved in getting to Boise I have my appointments here in Twin Falls. The technicians here e-mail the test results etc. to Boise and then we consult over the phone. Supposedly it is “easier”. Also, the very, very expensive medication that I have been taking is “time-sensitive”. I’ll explain as I go along.

On Friday I had an appointment in Twin Falls at 12:30.  When I called Boise at 3:30 to consult with them I ended up in a several hour game of phone tag full of miscommunications and anxiety.

• I called the Boise clinic and they prescribed more medicine,
• then I had to call a pharmacy on the east coast to ask them to overnight it and they said that they would once the doctor sent in the prescription,
• then the clinic in Boise called me to confirm that they had sent in my prescription and to remind me to double-check with the pharmacy,
• and then I had to call the pharmacy back to make sure they received it but then they told me that it was too late to be overnighted and I wouldn’t get it until at least Monday (even though it had only been about 20 minutes between conversations the e-mail from my doctor had arrived just after the deadline for overnight shipping – I was sooo mad!),
• and then I had to call my nurse in Boise back and she was super annoyed at the pharmacy. I was out of luck and out of medications which basically meant that the last few weeks of pills, self-injections, and hundreds of dollars were wasted because I can’t go three days without medications.  It just won’t work and we would have to try again next month. (This is where I became really emotional).

Luckily the nurse in Boise found an emergency supply of medication, but the catch was that I had to drive up and get it.  Their office is only open from 8:00 a.m to 10:00 a.m. on Saturdays. So instead of sleeping in Saturday morning (I know, I’m such a whiner) I got up at six-thirty, met my wonderful mom at a gas station in Twin Falls, and we made the two hour drive together. 

Once we got there everything was fine. I picked up the prescription, we went and did some shopping at Tai Pan Trading, went to the Olive Garden for lunch, had a fun drive home  and we were home by 5:00.  The day wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t what I wanted to spend my weekend doing.  All of my other plans went out the window because I had to have that medication and I had to have it immediately.

The stressing isn’t over.  I am supposed to have another appointment in Twin Falls on Monday, but the Boise clinic didn’t tell me that until the Twin Falls office was already closed.  I am hoping that I can call in early tomorrow morning and squeeze in somewhere. If I can’t, well, then it is possible that all of the stress, money, and emergency drive were still all a waste of time. If I do manage to somehow get pregnant this month it will be a complete miracle because as far as I can tell the universe is conspiring against me. 

But writing out my frustrations makes me feel better.  It makes me step out of my problems and look at them more objectively. I am feeling a little bit better already.

Halloween-ey!

Halloween is only a fun holiday if one really gets into it.  This year I am trying harder to catch that spooky Halloween-ey vibe.  We put out the Halloween decorations, including cute witches and huge scary spiders!

Tonight I decided we should carve some pumpkins. 

Jake got into it more than I thought he would.

I had a lot of fun too.

Sara joined us from Albuquerque to give us advice and encouragement.

They turned out nicely.  Don’t you think so? 

A Little Thank You–A Big Difference

Why do people become teachers?  Particularly teachers of middle school? Ask a middle school teacher you know and get back to me on that.  I bet that there are as many reasons as there are teachers.  For example:

• They like working with children.
• They like having  their summers free.
• They’re gluttons for punishment.
• They do it for the money.

Some days I wonder why I became a teacher.  There are some days when the lesson planning, and the unhappy parents, and the multiple meetings, and the discipline issues, and the middle school-er b.o. all join forces into one deadly combination that make me want to turn in my resignation and walk away.

Today was one of those days.

My lessons for the day weren’t ready- I needed to make 170 copies, type up a presentation, grade assignments that are piling up on my desk, and be at a committee meeting this morning by 7:30 a.m.  Unfortunately I slept in (I didn’t get up until 6:10 this morning!! Eep!!) and I didn’t get to school until 7:10! (I also had to swing by the ATM and get cash to give to a student doing a fundraiser. I don’t remember what it was for but I’ll be getting a Christmas scented candle out of the deal).  Long story short: I skipped the committee meeting, made the copies right before the bell rang, finished typing the presentation while I was giving it, and brought the papers home to grade tonight.

Anyway  what is the point of this, you ask?

Well, during 2nd period today a wonderful thing happened.  A former student, now a senior at TFHS, stopped by my classroom.  He came by to thank me for being his teacher 5 years ago.  He said that I have been his most inspirational teacher.

Did I tear up? Yes. Did I grin like an idiot? Probably. Was I floating on air when he left? Absolutely.  He didn’t have to do that. But of all the days to do it, I am glad that he picked today. Because it made all of my problems disappear.  Those few moments in my room made the rest of the day seem bright and cheery. Somehow I didn’t have a single discipline problem the entire rest of the day. 

I think maybe my favorite part of that moment was seeing the changes in him.  He is still the shy, quiet, boy that I remember. But now he is at least three times his previous size (serious growth spurt) and he has so much self confidence.  He looked grown up, mature, and ready to take on the world.

I don’t know exactly what motivated me to become a teacher back in college, but now my favorite part of being a teacher is running into former students. I like to see what they’re doing with their lives. I like to see what they look like when they’ve outgrown the braces, the acne, and the silly haircuts.  I like to see if they still remember all 23 helping verbs. Ha ha. (They never do.)

Okay, so I didn’t write this post so that I could brag about myself.  I don’t really know why I wrote it. Other than maybe to encourage you, my readers, to find someone who has meant something to you or one of your children and say thank you. That one moment from your day will do untold amounts of good.  I’ve had approximately 700 students pass through my classroom doorway in the last 6 years and I still remember almost every one of them (their names, if not their faces.) Hearing from the . . . um . . . 20 or so that keep in touch makes me get out of bed every morning and get back to work.

That’s why I teach middle school.

Opposites Attract

It’s true what they say- opposites really do attract.  Jacob and I are a good example of this principle.  Having him home the last few weeks has made me wonder how I ever survived without him for an entire year!   Jacob is a do-er. I’m a procrastinator. While I’m busy thinking of several different ways to fix a problem or, more likely, thinking of ways to avoid fixing a problem, Jacob already has it fixed. Done. Finished. What problem? 

I don’t consider myself a messy person. Creative maybe. Scatterbrained, definitely. But I sure love having Jacob around to keep me organized.

I began thinking about this as I folded laundry last night.  I had been thinking about doing laundry all weekend. Tonight I came upstairs and found a clean basket of laundry sitting on my bed. This surprised me for two reasons. One was because I never manage to wash and dry one load of laundry let alone complete the entire process in only one day, and two was because I was surprised that they hadn’t already been folded. I wondered what had stopped Jake from finishing the load? (Clearly I’m becoming lazy). However, I was so excited to finally be able to help with something that I jumped in and folded them immediately.  That’s actually beside the point.  Here is what I found when I tried to put away our socks.

My sock drawer:

Jake’s sock drawer:

Looking around the room I discovered other things that follow this same pattern.

Can you guess which bedside table belongs to me and which to him?  (Yes, the clocks tell different times. That’s my fault. As a procrastinator I have failed to change the batteries in my clock for. . . about a year and a half now.)

I also need to show off the linen closet (just to brag a little).

I have no idea where anything goes anymore because it didn’t look like this last time I opened these closet doors, but it sure looks nice. 

As does the man himself in his new Sunday suit!

I’m such a lucky girl!

Infertility: My Thoughts and Feelings

Infertility is a delicate and often touchy subject. Which is why I am going to face it head on and be as blunt as possible.  Why not?

It has been my experience that people with infertility often feel a sense of shame or embarrassment that prevents open and frank discussions.  People who do not have infertility are either curious but afraid to ask, or they feel guilty about their multitudes of adorable children and so they want to avoid the subject.  Either way they are often full of platitudes like, “If it’s meant to be, it will be” or “Everything happens on the Lord’s time.”

Well here is my story.  If you have questions feel free to leave them in the comments and I will answer them as honestly as I can and to the best of my limited medical knowledge.

I have a condition commonly called PCOS or PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome.  I have linked the acronym to a website if you are interested in reading more. According to womenshealth.gov between 1 in 10 and 1 in 20 women have PCOS which makes it fairly common. I am glad that it is so common because the more common something is the more likely that there is a treatment.  In my case, the treatment is a series of different medications. More on that in a minute.

Jacob and I began trying to have children several years ago. However, in order to even be diagnosed with infertility a woman must try to get pregnant for at least 12 months before doctors will consider looking for infertility issues.  The doctors in Twin Falls were finally able to diagnose me and started me on medications which I tried for several months.  When the medications didn’t work, we were referred to the Idaho Center for Reproductive Medicine in Boise.  We met with the doctors there and after an extensive dose of medications, self-injections, and multiple trips to Boise we were able to conceive Julia. The whole process took over two years.

Today we went back to the ICRM and met with Dr. Cristin Slater.  She was wonderful.  After our consultation and an examination we left feeling buoyed up and happy. She seems confident that we will be able to conceive and her confidence is contagious. So much so that we jokingly discussed baby names at dinner tonight.

Infertility is a very depressing condition.  I have several friends with infertility problems too and have been able to talk to them at length.  I know that, like me, they feel anger and disappointment. However I won’t speak for them, just for myself. My situation and coping techniques will be different than theirs and I have no right to speak for them.

Nothing seems more unfair in life than being denied something that many people have and don’t seem to deserve.  Nothing is worse than seeing people taking their children for granted.  Walking past the baby department in any store is painful.  All those cute little outfits and baby toys that we may never be able to buy. Facebook updates about babies are depressing. Baby showers are depressing.  The only thing as bad as that is when well meaning people ask about the children you don’t have.  They say things like, “when are you going to start having children?” or “why don’t you have any children yet?”.  It makes me feel like a failure.  Especially in a church where the commandment to “multiply and replenish the earth” is still going strong.  I find myself doubting my own self worth.  After all, if God can’t trust me to be a mother of His children, what is my purpose, or what have I done to deserve this?  These thoughts mostly occur on a monthly basis and go away after, say, 3-5 days.  I understand that they are fueled by hormones that I can’t control, but that does not make them any less real at the time.

If you know someone with infertility I’d like to offer you some advice.  First of all, don’t pretend that you understand. If you have healthy, chubby babies you don’t understand. That motherly urge is so ingrained into our bodies from generation to generation that to be denied its fulfillment is almost painful in and of itself.  Second, its okay to offer to let them hold or play with your children, but don’t force them to ooh and aah if they just don’t have it in them. Sometimes just being around other parents is emotionally exhausting. Finally, please remember that infertility does not just affect women.  The fact that I can not have children easily is as painful to my husband as it is to me.  Be aware that men also love children and may be sensitive to issues about babies.  He loves me unconditionally and for that I am grateful, but I know that he is looking forward to the day that we finally have a bigger family.

I know that I will have children eventually. Modern technology and faith in miracles are two powerful tools, especially when combined. I hope that it is sooner rather than later but in the meantime I am going to just keep blogging, hoping, and praying.

Student Writing Examples

I’ve written a couple of blogs about the humorous mistakes that my students make.  Now I want to take a few minutes to show some of the writing on the other side of the spectrum. 

My students recently wrote poems called “Come With Me” poems.  The poems were based on poetry by Barry Lane.  This is the video that the students watched to kick off the descriptive writing unit.

Hey, don’t judge free educational resources.

Anyway, they had to improve on the poem by including two examples of figurative language- similes, metaphors, hyperboles, or personification. These poems are cheesy and silly but they are meant to be descriptive and beautiful.  Here are some of the poems written by students in the Honors Language Arts class.

________________________

“Come With Me” by C.G.

Come with me to the shooting range.

See the brown, rough, tumble weed rolling past you as if it were alive.

Hear the loud bang of the rifles spitting out lead and hot brass. Boom! Bang! Crack!

Feel the aching soreness in your fingers as if you’ve been pulling the trigger 100 times.

Smell the gray gun smoke seeping out of the hot chambers like ghosts.

Taste the sweet, cool Gatorade that you brought with you.

__________________________

“Come With Me” by M.J.

Come with me to the zoo.

See  the white tiger as it smiles fiercely at the people watching

Hear the hyena’s laughter as they laugh at the sky.

Feel the cold exhibits glass as you press your face against the window.

Smell the wild exotic animal smells as you walk through the zoo.

Taste the cool, crisp air as you enjoy your day at the zoo.

_____________________________

“Come With Me” by R.A.

Come with me to the Oregon Coast.

See the ocean water twinkle and glisten as if the suns gleem is dancing on the ocean’s waves.

Hear the sound of seagulls tweeting loudly but calmly.

Feel the hot sand beneath your feet riding up in between your toes.

Smell the salt of the ocean on a cool, crisp day.

Taste the crisp, gooshy marshmallow in the night by the world brightening fire. Watch the waves crash on the soft sand of the Oregon Coast.

Say What–Take 3

The “Exit Ticket” or “Question of the Day” is posted in the same place in my classroom every day.  It is called an Exit Ticket because it is a ticket out the door and into the hallway. The students can’t leave until they answer the question.  It is usually a review of the day’s lesson.  This allows me to look back and see if there are any gaps or misunderstandings to clear up the next day.  The downside is that the students have already left the room before I get a chance to read the answers.  On really busy days I don’t get a chance to check them until after the last bell has rung and the students are gone for the entire day.  Today was one of those days.

The Exit Ticket is posted in the bottom corner of one of my whiteboards. Because it is in the corner it does not read straight across.  Today’s question looked like this:

Write down one

thing that you

would like to have

explained better.

Okay, I’ll admit that it could have been worded a little bit clearer (my first mistake).  My intention was to have students name one thing they would like me to reteach next week.  Because they were taking a quiz today, I assumed (my second mistake) that they would pick something on the quiz that was difficult to answer. I wasn’t expecting the answers that I received.

Here are three of about 20 answers:

• superpowers
• a cell phone to call my dad after school
• my parents to stop fighting all the time

Have you figured out where the misunderstanding lies?  These kids didn’t read all the way to the end of the question.  To them it read: Write down one thing that you would like to have. Period. So they did. 

Now, I can assure you that the entire sentence was written in the same clear handwriting and that there was no confusing punctuation.  It is also the same question that I asked last Friday when we were in class. This just goes to show that learning proper communication skills is a life long process.  Clearly I need to reteach how to read the question on the board, and they need to relearn how to read until the sentence is finished, not just until they feel like stopping.  They probably thought that was an unusual review question, but nobody said anything about it. 

Exercise

The Twin Falls School District has teamed up with the College of Southern Idaho to offer free fitness classes for employees and their spouses.  What a great deal!

L.O.L.

My friends and I decided to go to spinning tonight. It’s offered every Tuesday and Thursday. There were about fifteen of us in the class altogether and Jake came with me too which was nice.

About um… seven minutes into the program the lights were down and the music was loud and I remembered something really important that I had forgotten. 

I hate exercise. A lot.

I have no endurance, no stamina, no tolerance for pain, nothing. To my friends out there who enjoy running marathons and going to the gym I want you to know that you’re nuts. Absolutely.

I survived the class. I never quit. I also didn’t follow all the directions. When the instructor said go faster I just kept going nice and steady. But I also think my resistance was higher than hers because she was pedaling so much faster than I was. Like, really, really fast. By the end of the class I was sweating like a Coke can in July. It was disgusting! My hair was running with rivulets of water and my make-up was smeared on my face. Nasty.  

I am feeling much better now.  One nice, hot, long shower, a handful of chicken nuggets with Winger’s sauce, and FOUR no bake chocolate chip cookies later I think I may recover. And I kind of like the wiggly feeling in my knees as I walk down the stairs.  I won’t be going back this next Thursday because of a previous commitment, but I think I’ll go back again next week. Supposedly it gets easier and I’m all about easy.

Hip Hip Hooray!

Yea! Jake made it home last night! It has been one full year that he has been gone and I have missed him like crazy! I don’t have any pictures to post or any really great stories to share at the moment, but I just thought I should announce that my soldier is home safe and sound!  It was a wonderful feeling to come home from work today and find him sitting in front of his new computer. I think things are going back to normal!

Say What?

This may become a regular feature on this blog. Keep in mind I type these as I see them, spelling and grammar are the student’s- not mine!

Question of the day: When is spelling important?

Top 5 Answers:

5. when you right a story, when you do a aplickation, and when you read a book.

4. Spelling is importent when your wrighting.

3. when your at a stop sign

2. on friedays

1. On the weeks with 5 days.

 

I think I may have my work cut out for me this year.

The First Week

The first week of school is over already.  Looking back it wasn’t so painful after all. And it was fairly productive.

• I know the names of at least five kids in each class (140 names to go).
• We took yearbook pictures yesterday.
• I’ve signed up for lunch duty once a week. (I get free lunch on salad bar day, YES!)
• The first writing assignment is sitting on my desk, waiting to be graded.

To top the week off, I got to watch a colleague of my present to a small class at CSI about the curriculum in her class. It was an inspiring presentation because it reminded me of how much I do love my job, and how much my colleagues also love their jobs. I am already looking forward to Monday when I will introduce the first spelling unit of the year, modeled after the presentation that I saw last night.

This morning my iGoogle Daily Literary Quote was from Maya Angelou. I think this quote will become the motto I will strive for in my classroom. “You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you.”

Welcome Back Parents Night

I am exhausted!! Working three days in a row is hard!!! No, I’m kidding of course. Summer didn’t make me that lazy, but things have definitely been different the last few days. 

Tonight we had Welcome Back /Open House/Chaos Night.  It was… nuts.

Okay, I should probably start off with an apology to any parents that had to come watch me present to them.  I do know what I teach, I  am fairly professional, and I am not a total idiot, but I completely understand if I didn’t come off that way tonight.  Parents make me nervous. In a room full of 50 kids I would have been fine but throw a bunch of parents in the mix and I apparently turn into a rambling maniac who loves her job a bit too much. (I’m sorry. I like research papers. It’s nerdy. I know.)  I tried to be upbeat and positive while fitting a year’s worth of information into 8 minutes. I talked a million miles an hour, I was sweating like an animal because there was no A/C, and I was already tired from a long day at work. I probably looked like the energizer bunny on crack.

I’ve noticed that the jokes I tell the kids don’t go over as well with the parents. Occasionally, I would get a courtesy chuckle but not often. They seem to take their child’s education very seriously. And it’s not that I don’t take it seriously, but, I mean, come on people! We’re working with kids here. It has to be fun too!! Even people who are friends of mine outside of school wouldn’t laugh at my jokes tonight. Heck, by the end of the presentation they were barely making eye-contact with me.

I did meet one student’s dad that didn’t seem to think I was too weird. He liked the fact that I was from Jerome, Idaho and we played the “Do-You-Know-So-and-So-Game” and we totally know the same people. So that was good.

Oh well. Luckily it is over for now. If they don’t all un-enroll their children from my class tomorrow that will be a good sign. In the meantime, I need to go to bed because I’m exhausted.

And on a separate note – having teacher friends at school, and friends to meet up with after school, is a great way to let off that extra energy.  Thank goodness for the people in my life who keep me sane. 

Say What?

Question of the day: What is the difference between a good goal and a poor goal?

Answer: “a good goal is like trying to cure cancer, a bad goal is like trying to pick up a penny with youre toung wereing a bunch of under were.”

This is why I teach. It makes me think. And then it makes me laugh.

 

(Spelling is the student’s; not mine).

The First Day of Middle School

The first day of the school year is over!!! Thank goodness too! As far as I know everyone survived.  There were some tears, lost schedules, forgotten locker combos, and plenty of confused kids but we all survived. 

Really, the best part was the way everything seemed to fall into sync. It was just like a regular day at work. I had to keep reminding myself that these kids are new and that is why they are wandering around slightly cross-eyed with confusion. Other than that though, everything was pretty normal.  And normal, to me, is good.

My absolute favorite moment of the day though was before school even began.  Before the first bell rang the halls were already full of parents and students. I liked this because it was probably the last time the parents will be allowed to walk their kid to class and give them a big hug in front of teachers and classmates before the kids are “too cool”.  Soon they will be true middle –schoolers, but today they were just post-elementary kids who still wanted their parents to be with them on the first day of school to help them find their way.  The parents were clearly nervous, they kept repeating the locker combinations and going over the schedules out loud. One parent kept saying, “Let’s walk your route one more time so you’ve got it.” His daughter just kept replying, “No, Dad, I’ve GOT it already.” I think she was relieved when the bell rang and he had to go home.

I think my second favorite 6th grade moment was when the tardy bell rang for class around sixth period.  Up and down the hallways were little sixth graders fumbling with their locks and their schedules. As soon as they heard the bell ring, a collective groan went down the hall.  It was kind of funny to hear. They knew that they were late. . . again. “Awwwwwwww man!!!!!!”

Hopefully we’ll all do better tomorrow.

Students, Students, Students

I’ve got a lot on my mind this weekend so I’m going to do what I always do when I’m stressed- write about it.  The biggest thing on my mind right now are my 2011-2012 6th graders.  All 172 of them.  I haven’t met them yet, that will happen on Tuesday. But I have watched my class lists growing. I have made my seating charts, I have studied their ISAT scores from last year, I’ve even looked at their pictures, but for some reason I just don’t feel ready quite yet.  172 students is a lot of students!!

Here is what I know about them so far:

• Divided into six periods a day my average class size is 28 students. (Unfortunately my biggest class is 34 students and I only have 32 desks.)
• 81 of them are girls  (47%).
• 91 of them are boys (53%).
• 100% are going through the pre-pubescent, hormone driven, emotional turmoil of starting middle school.
• 30 are minority students. (17%)
• At least 2 don’t speak English fluently.
• 26 are new to the Twin Falls School District (meaning I have no educational information about them) (15%)
• 63 scored Advanced (great) on last year’s tests. (37%)
• 64  scored Proficient (good) on last year’s tests. (38%)
• 14  scored Basic (not good) on last year’s tests.  (8%)
• Only 5 scored Below Basic (bad) on last year’s tests.(2%)
• At least 50 come from one parent /split parent homes. (30%)
• 11 have a learning accommodation currently in place. (6%)
• 9 have been identified as Gifted and Talented. (5%)
• 6 of them have a medical condition I need to be prepared for in case of an emergency.
• There are three sets of identical twins!
• A few students are homeless.
• 95 students will be 11 years old, 74 students will be 12 years old, 2 of them will be 13 years old, and one little girl is only 10 years old.  (To put this into perspective, 55 % of these students were less than a year old on 9/11/01).

 

It’s easy to break these students down into numbers. They’re actually less intimidating that way. After all, what’s scary with only 2% being so low? Or 5% being G&T?  The problem is actually in the quantity of personalities that will flood my room on Tuesday morning.  Each student has an individual perspective on life. My job will be to find 172 different ways to help them understand English grammar. Some of them will want it explained to them verbally, some of them will need to read examples from a book, some of them will need to have hands on practice, some of them will understand it the first time, some will need it explained multiple times, and a good majority of them just won’t care about grammar at all. 

And they’re not separated into class periods by age, gender, ISAT scores, poverty level, or learning styles.  They’re all jumbled together. 

For example: in the class of 34 students 1 student is gifted and talented, 2 have special ed accommodations, 1 has a medical issue, 11 are from split homes, 2 were below basic, 1 was basic, 14 were proficient, 10 were advanced and 7 are wild cards because they are new and I have no information about them.  Whew! It’s a good thing that class is after lunch so I can gear myself up for them!  

Despite it all, I’m actually quite excited for next week. The bulletin boards are eye-catching. Copies of the syllabus have been made. The first homework assignment is ready to go home. I have prepared as much as I can. Now I just need to take a deep breath and try to enjoy my Labor Day weekend. Because when it is over, there’s no turning back!

One Man’s Junk…

I’m going to be honest here: I’m not really one of those great crafter/redecorator types. Occasionally I have fits of madness where I attempt craftiness (my bedroom, for example, the unfinished quilt in my basement for another) and then I enlist the help of someone craftier than I to save me.   I wish that I was craftier, but, to be honest, some of those crafty people blogs kind of overwhelm me, and – to be really honest- I’m too lazy to put in that much work.  However, today I got bitten by the crafty bug again and I am feeling pretty darn proud of myself. True to form I enlisted help from my mom and together I think we did a pretty good job. 

I decided that my classroom needed warmer, cozier lighting than the fluorescent bulbs offered, so Mom and I went lamp shopping.  We went to a few thrift stores and consignment shops before we found our first treasure- a floor lamp for $5 at St. Vincent de Pauls!  A little while later we found our second treasure – another floor lamp at the Salvation Army for a whopping $2!!

 

This picture doesn’t do justice to the metallic gold shine or the gaudy white metal.

Next we went to Target where we priced lamp shades – average was like $15 for a so-so shade- totally not worth it.

So, we went to Lowe’s. (I Lowe’s).  There we found a can of spray paint ($5) and really cute lamp shades ($9 a piece) ! For a finishing touch we stopped by Michaels and bought some Halloween ribbon that was on sale (don’t even get me started on that obnoxiousness. I mean, Halloween already, seriously gross!).

(For those of you keeping track this means that the more expensive lamp has now cost about $16.)

Here are my finished projects:

  

 

Aren’t they great!?

Now I need  your help. I liked these so much that I want to redo the floor lamp that is in my living room but I don’t know which one I liked more. Please help me out! Should I do the patterned shade or the plain shade with the polka dot ribbon? I just can’t make up my mind!

One More Reason I Love My Man

There are actually a lot more reasons I love my husband but today I was reminded of another one.  He never forgets an important date and he has great taste in beauty.

The Best Man

I have often wondered why the groom at the wedding isn’t called “The Best Man”. Doesn’t that seem silly? I mean, after all, if there is a “best man” than that would indicate that everyone else is secondary in awesomeness, and who wants to marry the runner-up?

That’s just some food for thought as I contemplate how very lucky I am to be married to such a wonderful man. In fact, I would go so far as to say that he might even be “The Best Man Ever” and he is certainly not a runner-up. We have been married for five wonderful years. Here are some of the reasons that I believe my Jacob is wonderful:

He is romantic.

He is intelligent.

(sometimes I wish I had his way with words)

He is very good looking.

(especially in uniform)

He is a hard worker.

He is romantic.

(Roses for me!)

He is popular with the little kids. 

He’s a good cook.

He loves to laugh.

(No, seriously, he’s happy in this picture). 

He spoils me.

(yep, I got a diamond necklace for my birthday!)

He makes me laugh.

He loves me (crazy quirks and all).

He’s very good looking.  Have I mentioned that yet?

Happy Anniversary Jacob!! I love you!

8 more weeks. . .

Last September I made a goal to watch at least one movie a week for an entire year. That would be a full fifty-two movies.  Well, I haven’t posted about it in a while but that doesn’t mean that I’m not still working on this goal.  It has been 44 weeks already! For those of you doing the math that means that there are about 8 weeks left until my one year goal is complete!!  Some of these movies I saw in the theatre. Some of them I watched with family, some with friends, and some by myself. Here is my complete list of movies I have watched so far this year.

1. Only Angles Have Wings
2. The Glass Bottom Boat
3. French Kiss
4. Time Travelers Wife  
5. Benny and Joon
6. Mansfield Park
7. Amelie
8. Last Chance Harvey
9. The Duchess
10. How to Train Your Dragon  
11. In Love and War
12. Oscar
13. When in Rome
14. August Rush
15. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1
16. Anna and the King
17. The Shop around the Corner
18. One Fine Day
19. Let’s Make it Legal
20. Sherlock Holmes (Masterpiece Mystery Miniseries)
21. Downton Abbey (Masterpiece Miniseries)
22. Inception
23. Nights in Rodanthe
24. Prince of Persia: Sands of Time
25. One Night with the King
26. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
27. The Bounty Hunter
28. The King’s Speech
29. Jerry Maguire
30. Easy A
31. New in Town
32. Tangled  
33. True Grit (the new one)
34. Dakota Skye
35. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
36. Miss Potter
37. Much Ado about Nothing
38. Not Since You
39. The Fighter
40. The Killers
41. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2
42. Just Go With It
43. The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer
44. The Long Hot Summer

The Thumbs Up and Thumbs Down are my own very subjective opinions.   I’m really not a very good movie critic because I am generally very easily entertained and so I like a lot things that aren’t necessarily fabulous. I certainly hope that no one makes this list the end-all list of a good movies review.  They might be very disappointed. Haha.  But I guess that since I enjoyed them that is all that really matters right?