Teacher Chronicle: Getting Ready for School

The first step that every teacher needs to take in order to be ready for the beginning of the school year is completely mental.  

Becoming mentally prepared should begin at least three weeks in advance of the first teacher work day.  Around this time non-teacher-friends will begin to say “Are you ready for school to start again?”  The answer to this question is “NO!!!!!” mainly because one can never be completely ready for school to start and certainly not in the first week of August.  Teacher-friends will also begin asking this question. The answer is also “NO!!!!!” to which they reply “Yeah, me neither”. Although the fact that they asked this question proves otherwise. We are all beginning to think of school fondly again, at least a little bit. We spent the entire month of June trying to unwind from battles with little Tarzan and his gang of ape followers and just about the time the nightmares stopped-  July appeared.  We enjoyed July – it was either relaxing or so packed full of summer we are reanalyzing the definition of “vacation”. Now it is August and we can safely look back at the previous school year and evaluate what went well (Research Report Presentations – encourage more kids to bring in cake for their visual aide) and what went wrong (I know which seating charts I won’t be using this year!).

Making plans for a new school year is a lot like making New Years Resolutions. If I don’t write them down, I won’t remember them.  So my favorite tool for mentally preparing for a new school year is a spiral notebook.  I think it’s very convenient that they are on sale (yea for Back to School sales) this time of year.  I never know when a new-school-year idea will hit me.  It’s usually somewhere inconvenient like the shower, while walking the dog, or right before I fall asleep.  Last week I was just drifting off to sleep when it occurred to me that a great way to teach abstract nouns would be to use the Pledge of Allegiance. It’s full of words like ‘allegiance,’ ‘republic,’ ‘liberty',’ and ‘justice’; but then I came across the word God. Oops. Is God concrete or abstract? NO WAY am I having that conversation with 11 year olds! Do I want to get sued?!?!?!  Still, the use of my spiral notebook came in very handy while I thought this through.  I also use it to design bulletin boards, keep lists of supplies to buy, create possible seating charts and work out lesson plan ideas.  Once that notebook starts to fill up with new ideas and possibilities then I can begin to say I am getting excited to get back into school.

And being excited is the first step to being ready.

Destruction

Sammy is like a whirlwind of destruction. Since he has been in our home he has destroyed:

• the wooden floor
• the globe stand
• one pair of flip flops
• my computer mouse
• the plastic barbecue grill cover
• sections of my back yard (huge holes)
• two balls
• a John Grisham novel (sorry Crystal, I’ll replace it)
• the back of the couch
• a wicker basket

We’re also having a really hard time potty training him. He knows that he is not supposed to make messes in the house. Every time he does, he will go and hide in the other room or in his kennel, but he never lets us know he wants to go outside. I have literally been playing with him, petting him, or feeding him and he will just walk away from me and squat. He never whines or barks first. He never walks to the door or tries to get out. I never know when it is coming. When we catch him, we put his nose to the mess and spank him, then we put him outside for a while. When he goes potty outside I always try to give him a treat and tell him what a good dog he is. He doesn’t seem to be catching on very well though. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to fix this problem? I am really tired of scrubbing my floors.

Busy Busy Summer Time

      It is said that “time heals all wounds”.  I am certainly not “healed” (not even close), but I am definitely too busy too mope around or wallow in sadness. As much as we often wish it wouldn’t, time continues to progress and other people’s lives also continue to move on.  We have no choice but to follow and hopefully make the most of it.  I made a conscious choice to not be at home on my original due date, hence the trip to Oregon.  Jake’s sister is getting married in August and there are preparations to make.  Church assignments are a great way to stay busy, there’s nothing like magnifying a calling and serving others to keep the mind and hands active.  Then before we knew it, almost 3 months have passed by and we are surprised to learn that we may survive, and not just survive but possibly even thrive, for we know that we are stronger and better people for the trials we have endured. 

    Can you believe that there is only one more month before school starts?  I can’t.  It seems like June and July have just disappeared right before our eyes.  Besides adding Sammy to our family and taking a trip to the beach, we’ve also:

• Visited the Aviation and Space Museum in McMinnville, Oregon where we went inside the Spruce Goose, saw the Titan III, and a Blackbird.

 

• “Worked” in the container garden, which is getting ready to harvest.

  

• Celebrated Jacob’s 28th birthday.

 

• Helped plan and throw a bridal shower for my sister-in-law, with the help of my good friend Jenna.

 

• Put together my new craft room. Jake put up the shelves, and my mom and I bought the baskets and organized my crafty stuff.  It’s pretty messy right now because I’ve actually been using it quite a bit!

 

• Learned how to sew my own skirts (hence the messy craft room).

 

• Went to Girls Camp with the Twin Falls South Stake.

 

• Finished several more books.

 

But the summer’s not over yet and the month of August is already filling up. Fall will be here before we know it. 

Welcome to Oregon!

Finally, a real summer vacation! Jacob and I hit the road yesterday morning and headed for the Pacific coast. We are staying in Lincoln City at the Coho Lodge, a half way decent motel with a much more luxurious website, and a wonderful view of the ocean.
This morning we explored the coast like the tourists that we are. We drove down the coast to Newport and went to the Oregon Coast Aquarium. Below is a picture of Jake in the Passage of the Deep Exhibit where we saw many scary looking sharks.

This sign was in front of the Otter Exhibit. Jake has decided he needs one in his office.

After the aquarium we went to the Newport Cafe. The food was great. Jake ordered the 1lb Monster Burger. I think it might be one of the biggest burgers I've ever seen. It looked delicious. I'll find out tonight when we finish the rest of it for dinner tonight.

We spent the afternoon on the beach in front of the lodge. The ocean is amazing. I have been to the coast a few times in my life, but I can't get over how truly impressive it is. I picked the coast for our vacation because I've heard that it is calm and peaceful here. But the ocean is never peaceful. It's always crashing, always churning. And though its not peaceful, it is consistent. Each wave will always be followed by another wave, and then another, and then another. The ocean doesn't operate only during certain hours, it never takes holidays. And that is peaceful, I suppose. It's good to know that you can always count on it to keep doing what it does best: look beautiful!

Meet Sammy

Sammy is a new addition to our family this summer! He is a very ferocious 12 week old Black Lab/English Pointer Cross guard dog

. 

 

Sammy was one of ten puppies from his litter.  Most of them were sold but the remaining few were given to the Magic Valley Animal Shelter, which is where we found Sammy on Thursday.  We brought him home on Friday and introduced him to Frank, the cat.  Frank was NOT happy about our new addition.  When Jake got them too close together, Frank got so scared he bit Jake and then tinkled on the floor!  He hasn’t come upstairs since then! 

(Jake was taken to the E.R. on Saturday when his hand swelled up.  He’s on antibiotics and doing much better.)

Sammy loves to play outside, have his tummy rubbed, and chew on everything. 

Even the floor . . .

When I caught him eating and then vomiting up rocks in the yard, I jumped on Google (what did we do before Google?) and discovered that eating rocks is BAD! Who would have guessed?  But a nice substitute for rocks is ice.  I think Sammy agrees.  He hasn’t chewed on the floor since I gave him a big bowl of ice cubes!

Sammy’s favorite part of being outside, beside the large collection of rocks, is playing in the grass.  This is a video of how Sammy “walks” when he is on the grass. . .

Baklava

Jacob and I ran errands this morning.  While he was at the armory, I took a few minutes to walk down to the CSI farmers market.  It turns out that the farmers market is really much more of a flea market and the only fresh produce there was rhubarb.  I wandered around and looked at the homemade wooden chairs, afghans, finger puppets, jams, pies, and even home cooked doggie treats.  Then I discovered this adorable little woman, in Eastern Europe clothing, missing a few teeth, but with a big friendly smile on her face. She was selling homemade Ukrainian Baklava.

I couldn’t help myself, I had to buy one. In case you’re wondering, baklava is an Arabic type pastry the size of a hot pocket, and filled with cinnamon, honey, and nuts.  I took my prize back to the armory and split it with Jake.  He’s had baklava before, while in Iraq.  It was yummy.  It was a little bit dry, but it was also flaky and sweet.  I liked it a lot!

There are lots of different opinions about the CSI refugee program.  I know that the refugees qualify for government welfare, and don’t speak English, and are from countries that are often received with raised eyebrows when mentioned, but I for one am benefitting from it.  I am learning a lot about other cultures because they are here, and that is a good thing.  How else would I ever have gotten to try homemade baklava?  I am certainly not going to Ukraine any time soon. So, if you’re in town and feel like experiencing something a little bit different and new, I would recommend stopping by CSI on a Saturday morning between 9-1.  Who knows what you might find?!

Summer Vacation

Please notice that this is not a "Chapter" post. My life is so full and busy with friends, family, and hobbies that there is much to write about outside of the grief and sorrow that is for Julia. Episodes of sadness and grief are temporarily taking a back seat to life, laughter, and sunshine. I will still have "Chapters" to write about: for example her headstone will be in in a few weeks, and milestones will come and go throughout the next year that I'm sure will be considered "Chapters" in her life, but for now I am tucking her into my heart and it is time for me to live my life.

First of all, I have been very busy working on the front porch of my house. I have a large south facing front porch that gets sunshine all day long. My mom and I have spent many hours perusing flower shops for good deals on pottery and plants. The front porch has been the setting for many wonderful conversations and peaceful moments. It's fun to rock back and forth, sipping lemonade and watching the flowers grow. It is also sheltered somewhat from the rain and I like to take a heavy quilt outside and watch the raindrops pitter patter on the flower petals or curl up with a good book. Because I don't have a garden space this year, I am trying container gardening. It is too early to see the fruit of my labors (literally) but so far the plants seem to be thriving. I have planted two tomato plants, three bell peppers, a box of onions, two cucumbers, and several different herbs.

Many people gave Jacob and I beautiful flower arrangements in memory of Julia. The hanging baskets and geraniums have made a beautiful addition to my porch. We were also given 9 roses which we planted in front of the porch. They are a variety of species and colors and I look forward to some warmer weather when they will bloom. Roses hold a special meaning to Jacob and I because it is my middle name and we often use roses to symbolize our affection for one another. To all of you who donated to this beautiful memorial garden, I thank you!

(Oops! Please tilt your head to see the picture!)

Second, is books! Reading is the best way to spend summer vacation. My sweet friend Crystal lent me more books than I will ever be able to read in a life time I'm sure! Many other friends have stopped by with books and book suggestions and my sister in law and I made a trip to the library the other day where we also stocked up on some summer reading. In the last three weeks I have read:

• Confessions of a Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella
• The Street Lawyer by John Grisham
• Joy Cometh in the Morning: a Story of Healing from the Loss of a Child by Fran C. Hafen
• Dancing in the Light by Anita Stansfield
• A Dance to Remember by Anita Stansfield
• The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan
  Sarah's Key by Tatiana de Rosney
• Set in Stone by Linda Newbery

Finally, I've started exercising again. Just like last summer, my friend and I are determined to see improvements. Even if we haven't improved physically, I know this has been great emotional therapy for both of us. We get up and go every morning at 7:30. Hopefully soon we'll be back at the canyon though I need a little more time to prepare before I take on that challenge!

The next weeks are filling up with barbecues, birthday parties, picnics, and bicycle rides. Yea for summer vacation!!!!

Chapter 15: Rain

I sat down to write about the rain, and how it was reflective of my mood today. Rain is usually associated with sadness and tears, country music songs crooning something about tears from angels in heaven and so on. It would have been a perfect comparison. But by the time I got my laptop set up, cozied up in my armchair, and began to type, the rain had stopped. The sun was shining on the puddles, and there were three little birds splashing in the gutter, looking quite happy. In fact, the world looks clean and bright right now; the grasses are green and growing, and the flowers and trees are looking perfectly delighted with themselves. It’s hard to write about rain when the sun is shining.

And come to think on it, that is more reflective of my moods this week than the rain would have been. I have sunny moments and rainy moments. But following right behind every rainy moment is another sunny moment. Each day is a different experience. Although I had two good days in a row this week. I bought and planted lots of flowers on my front porch, talked to good friends, and went out to lunch and had a really nice time. I was so surprised that I almost didn’t believe it when I went to bed last night realizing I hadn’t cried in almost 36 hours. Then this morning came along and one thing after another has set me to tears.

The deal with tears, though, is that I enjoy them. Crying makes me feel better. After every good cry I am strong again, ready to take on the world, at least for a moment. And it’s okay to cry. Like the rain that helps bring life to our desert, tears keep me from becoming dry and numb. Sometimes I become afraid that I am closing my heart, building a barrier to protect myself. That barrier shuts out not only the angry, hurt feelings, but also the people I love and who care about me. It also shuts out Julia. Tears wash away that barrier, opening me up to the knowledge that I am loved and that I will be okay, someday. Sure, that barrier keeps me from being hurt, but it also keeps me from being truly happy.

I can’t believe how blue the sky has become, even in the last half hour, it almost looks like summer. But I can also see another big, black rain cloud building up on the horizon. Well, as short lived as the sunshine will be, its comforting to know that the rain won’t last forever either. . .

Chapter 14: I Buried My Baby

I buried my baby today. It was one of the most heart wrenching steps of this ordeal. She was laid out in a white blessing gown sewn especially for a micro-preemie, and she had a little white head band on her head. Her beautiful little face was at peace. She almost had a smile on her lips. Her hands laid gently to her side. She was beautiful. We sat there, Jake and I, with our mothers on either side of us, in front of a tiny, sweet white casket. The sun was warm, the breeze was gentle, and I felt a beautiful peace in my heart. Still I cried. Alot. I couldn't help myself. My little tiny baby is gone. I know this. I know her soul is in Heaven. And yet, her sweet angelic little face was sleeping so peacefully in front of me and I cried. I didn't cry for Julia. She feels no pain and the life she would have had, even if she had lived, would have never been a life worth living. I cried for myself. I cried for my husband. I cried because I could and because I wanted to. I wanted a baby so badly and the Lord gave me a perfect soul to love forever. But my arms were empty and the casket was full, and life didn't seem fair at that moment. I know the body in that casket was simply a shell, used to house her beautiful spirit while she was here on earth. Her spirit was there, in our hearts, where it will remain forever. Still, no mother should have to bury her children. No father should have to dedicate his child's grave. Jake, by the way, did a perfect job. He is strong and steady, even when I know he doesn't always want to be strong and steady. He is my strength.

After the service we came back to the house where we were loved and hugged by countless numbers of people. I will never again feel alone or unnoticed. I was overwhelmed by the scores of family and friends who came to show their support. Thank you. To have come home to an empty house would have been a burden we could not have borne. But to come home to a house full of love, and some laughter, and warm, comforting embraces, made this day bearable. The Relief Society took care of most of the refreshments and they did a wonderful job. Everyone's contributions were wonderful. Just as there are no words of comfort to offer to Jacob and I at this time except "I love you," there are no words to express my gratitude to my family and friends except "thank you," and "we love you."

It will be time now to find our new "normal" as one friend said today. Tomorrow we will have to come to the realization that there are no more preparations to make, there are no important decisions to occupy our minds. Now we can begin to heal, to move forward with our lives. Julia is a beautiful part of our lives, and we will carry her forward with us, but now we must balance our pain and our grief, with life in the real world. We must tuck her away in our hearts as we pick up our hobbies, return to work (Jacob, not me -- it's summer time for me), continue the yard work, and strengthen ourselves for the next challenge life springs on us. Please continue to include us in your prayers. It is the source of our strength and with your love we will make it.

Chapter 13: A Day at a Time

Everyone copes with loss and death differently. There are no rules to follow or steps to take. I didn't know what to expect of myself or of Jacob. Neither of us have ever experienced anything as powerful as the death of a child and neither of us knew what we would feel or how we would cope. I feel as though I am in a protective bubble, safe from the pain and sorrow that I know I should be feeling. Maybe some people would call it shock, others might call it denial, but to me it feels like strength; the strength to get up and start each day as though it were a regular day, the strength to take care of my aching post-surgery body, the strength to joke and laugh with my husband, the strength to plan a service for my baby girl. I never thought I would have the strength to sit across a table from a mortician and discuss funeral arrangements as though it were an everyday occurrence. Maybe next week, when I no longer need this strength, it will leave me. However, I know that this strength isn't coming from me. This is a powerful gift from my Father in Heaven. It is an answer to the many prayers offered in our behalf. He may have taken little Julia home to be with him, but he has given me the strength to accept His will. He has blessed us with an overwhelming feeling of love from friends and family members, as well as an abundance of love for each other. I have never felt closer to Jake than I have this week. We each stay busy with different activities to keep ourselves distracted, but we always make time for each other. Jacob has taken care of my stitches, he lifts me into the pickup when we travel, he monitors my medications to make sure I take them, and basically spends his time being the best nurse a person could ask for. I am very lucky.

I am also lucky to have the Gospel in my life. I know, not just believe but KNOW, that my little girl is with her Father in Heaven. I also know that she is part of my eternal family forever. Nothing will ever be able to separate us, especially not death. Her death was not good-bye. It was simply a "until we meet again". She was a very special little girl. I wish everyone could have had the chance to meet her and to feel her amazing spirit. I know I am a biased source, but she was too good for this world. I'm proud to be the mother of such a wonderful person and I can not wait to be with her again. She is my pride and joy, despite her short mortal life.

To honor her sweet life, we have planned a graveside service for immediate family only on Wednesday afternoon. We know that many friends would like to come and show their support, but we feel that her service should be as small and simple as her life was. However, we have also planned an open house for later Wednesday afternoon, and it is open to anyone who is interested in coming. It will be from 3:00 to 5:00 at our house. I am not going to post my address on the internet for obvious reasons, however if someone would like to come and does not know where we live, they can call or e-mail myself or any members of our family, who will gladly give you directions. If you can not reach a member of the family please leave a comment with your e-mail address and I will try to get back to you by Wednesday morning.